3.30.2011
bully baby
"Do not make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans or they will treat you like dogs."
- Martha Scott
3.29.2011
Drooling Dog with One Blue Eye
"A traveler must have the back of an ass to bear all, a tongue like the tail of a dog to flatter all, the mouth of a hog to eat what is set before him, the ear of a merchant to hear all and say nothing."
- Thomas Nashe
3.28.2011
3.27.2011
Silver Dog
"Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar."
- Steve Allen
3.25.2011
3.24.2011
AM-PM Chicho
"Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end."
- Max Eastman
3.23.2011
Hipster Chicho
"Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat."
- Rule 46, Oxford Union Society, London
3.22.2011
Parked Chicho
"I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles."
- Steven Wright
3.21.2011
3.20.2011
Pug on the Move
"People who love soft methods and hate iniquity forget this; that reform consists in taking a bone from a dog. Philosophy will not do it."
-John Jay Chapman
3.19.2011
Timid Dog
"I would rather see the portrait of a dog that I know, than all the allegorical paintings they can show me in the world."
- Samuel Johnson
3.18.2011
Two Crazy Little Dogs at the Lake
"I took my dog for a walk... all the way from New York to Florida... I said to him "There now you're done."
- Steven Wright
3.17.2011
Mama Dog
"Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up."
- "DEEP THOUGHTS" by Jack Handy
3.16.2011
Garage Sale Dogs
'If a picture wasn't going very well I'd put a puppy dog in it, always a mongrel, you know, never one of the full bred puppies. And then I'd put a bandage on its foot... I liked it when I did it, but now I'm sick of it."
- Norman Rockwell
3.15.2011
Little Dog with Big Ears and an Underbite
"What kind of life a dog . . . acquires. I have sometimes tried to imagine by kneeling or lying full length on the ground and looking up. The world then becomes strangely incomplete; one sees little but legs."
- E V Lucas
3.14.2011
Proud Boxer
"A really companionable and indispensable dog is an accident of nature. You can't get it by breeding for it, and you can't buy it with money. It just happens along."
- E B White, The Care and Training of a Dog
3.13.2011
3.12.2011
Safe under the Table
"Four years in the White House and two presidential campaigns is an awful long time. In politics, every year in the White House is like dog years, six years off your life."
-George Stephanopoulos
3.11.2011
3.10.2011
Lil Dog, Big Lawn
"Sure I know where the press room is - I just look for where they throw the dog meat."
Martina Navratilova
3.09.2011
Big-Eyed Dog
"A blue dog, you know, is the opposite of a yellow dog. And a yellow dog was somebody who was willing to follow his party even when he knew it was wrong."
Mike Thompson
3.08.2011
3.07.2011
3.06.2011
3.05.2011
Dog at the Park with Grandma
"The life of an uneducated man is as useless as the tail of a dog which neither covers its rear end, nor protects it from the bites of insects."
-Chanakya
3.04.2011
That same Bully, in Pink.
"Be thou comforted, little dog, Thou too in Resurrection shall have a little golden tail."
-Martin Luther
3.03.2011
Nina and her Toys
"It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass."
-Rodney Dangerfield
3.02.2011
Mexican Tree Dog
"The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he's got."
-Will Rogers
3.01.2011
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